So since we haven’t yet made it through the first full week of the new year, I don’t think it’s too late for me to send out this testimonial review of my 2018.
I struggled back and forth with myself about whether I would sit down and actually write out the memories I had of the past year. I feel like I felt A LOT last year and it doesn’t take much for me to feel it all again, with each recollection I unveil. But I have been really mentored and ministered to by the writings of Audre Lorde as of late and her dedication to breaking the silences have inspired me to write my truths no matter how scary, uncomfortable, or awkward. This is part of my healing process. So here goes nothing: My 2018, the good, the bad and the ugly…
Of course there were many other impactful moments but these memories really stand out to me because it shows how complex life is and how drastically it can change. I went from celebrating life to not wanting to be here, to manifesting my dreams, to the verge of a mental/emotional breakdown, school burnout, spiritual rejuvenation, redemption and triumph! I survived the worst parts of myself. The worst thoughts, the worst moments. And I thrived. I’ve already ugly cried in 2019 but I’m no longer afraid of the darkness or my dark moments because I know I want to be here. I deserve to be here.
And I will fight with every ounce of strength in me to stay!